Is a family vacation really that important?
What you think about family vacations probably largely depends on your past experience with them. For me, they have been a tremendous blessing. Vacations were always an important part of our family life when I was a child and they continue to be as an adult with my own children. The most important part was rarely the destination, but more significantly the company. We vacationed at many different places. Most frequently Topsail Beach, North Carolina was our destination of choice. While the places we went played a role in what recreations we enjoyed there, it rarely impacted whether the vacation was enjoyable itself. I remember many things about our vacations and the great places where we spent them.
However, the bonding and interaction with my parents and siblings were much more important and memorable than the location. The thing that always impressed me about our own family vacations was that my parents were intentional not to overspend our budget. They did not incur credit card debt and did not damage us financially in our future just for a vacation week. As an adult, I appreciate how significant those things are given that we often had lower income. I decided it would make sense to find out exactly what the mentality was behind planning a vacation, and why my parents valued it so much. So I asked my mom! This is what she had to say:
Our vacations in my childhood cost very little since our family had one income and four children. Often we would go to a state park to camp in our pop-up camper. We would go fishing, swimming, and play games. Mom made food that always tasted better prepared outside and eaten on a picnic table! I have memories of special trips to Williamsburg, Virginia, and Florida as well as many other of the northwestern states. For nearly all of these, we were frugal and stayed in our pop-up camper. We ate sandwiches at the rest stops and Mom made meals on our camp stove. I loved it! These get-a-way times gave me a chance to see my parents outside of their stress-filled worlds. Their personalities really shone through and gave us a chance to explore new sights and have fun together.
As an adult, my husband and I took our family regularly to our favorite spot at the beach in North Carolina. We taught our children to love riding the waves with us, building sandcastles, and taking walks in the sand. Our trips were marked by frugality: buying groceries and preparing meals rather than eating out. Often we went with family friends that would help offset the cost of the house we rented during our stay. We did not purchase many souvenirs and limited costly activities. We did, however, take many pictures!
On the financial side, we planned our trips at least 6 months in advance. We paid a portion of the housing several months before the trip. Usually, our federal tax return would be used to cover the remaining cost. We never used credit cards or accumulated debt to go on vacation. In addition to our beach vacations, we went to go to Disney World, Washington D.C., and Chicago as well as other vacations in the Florida area.
My husband changed careers and returned to school about ten years after we were married. That transition left us with fewer funds for any big vacations, so we found ourselves visiting state parks, camping, and taking shorter adventures to places like zoos and caves. We were even fortunate enough to be included in vacations with some friends who had a time share.
Whether we took big or small vacations, our time away allowed us to focus on each other and “play” together. It enabled us to leave our stress-filled jobs behind and to develop deeper relationships within our family. It is great fun to reminisce about our various vacations over the years. Looking at old photos and telling stories about the crazy things that happened to us during our adventures is a treat. I am so glad for all those times and look forward to making more memories with my husband, children, and now grandchildren as we continue to plan our family vacations.
When I asked my mom to write up something about how she and my dad had planned for family vacations I did not really know what to expect from them. As a child, I never had a role in the planning and budgeting for such events, and I wasn’t sure just how in depth that went. It was encouraging to find that they did not have very specific planning that went into the way they paid for their vacation. Like most of us, they had financial situations that varied through the years. Because of that, so did their plans for paying for those vacations.
The overwhelming thing I noticed though, is something we all can take to heart when planning family vacations. They were intentional. When money was tighter, they took trips that fell within their means. Rather than bemoaning our tighter finances, they made the most of those trips by doing things that cost less. In many cases, poor is a state of mind. While growing up there were probably several times where we fell close to or below the poverty line, but I have never felt poor. That was in large part due to my parents’ attitude and behaviors.
When we had the opportunity to take bigger vacations, my parents planned them far in advance. They paid for them through saving and tax returns and minimized the costs while on those vacations. How specifically they paid for those vacations was not as important as how they did not. They did not allow a vacation to become a burden on the family by overextending themselves or accruing a bunch of credit card debt. That would have just resulted in more stress, which defeats the purpose of a vacation in the first place.
Your financial situation will not always look the same. It will not always be like the one faced by your friends or family. It is your own. So trying to give you a one-stop solution for saving and taking a great family vacation won’t work. What you have to do is be intentional about taking some kind of vacation. Those are formative times in family relationships. You won’t get that time back and it is something that is impossible to put a price on.
What isn’t impossible is to diligently plan, know what you can afford to spend, and take trips you can afford. Everyone would love to be able to take their dream vacation every year. That doesn’t usually happen. If you cannot afford the beach, don’t just give up and declare vacation canceled. Take a trip you can afford and have fun doing it. It is a blessing to get to spend time together as a family no matter where you are. What is more, you are building memories that you and your loved ones can look back on for years and appreciate.